|Taken on my birthday, 11/1/11 34weeks4days|
I had my last prenatal appointment on Dec. 7, 2012 and had already been dialated at 3cm for a week, my doctor decided to do a sweep to hopefully push me into labor. Well it worked because that evening I went for a walk at Target and an hour later was having mild contractions every 5minutes. So at 10:35pm I was admitted to the labor and delivery floor. I would love to say that I had complications during my labor and that thats why I lost my baby girl. But that is not the case my labor was very routine, at 3:30am I was given the epidural and at 4am my water was broken. By 7:20am i was fully dialated and ready to push. My baby girl was born at 7:32am wieghing 7lbs 8oz and measuring 20inches. She did cry and I was able hold her. She didnt want to take my breast so we assumed she just didnt want to eat. My nurse took her from me and said ' I want her to cry some more' I was like oh okay. She did cry some more and then was taken to the nursery along with my husband. I was taken to my room at around 8:30am and by 11 I still hadnt seen my baby. By 12pm I called the nurse and asked why I hadnt seen my little girl....alittle after 1pm a pediatrician came into my room and said that my little girl was having some trouble breathing but that it was normal, that sometimes baby just needed alittle more time to learn how to breath. That I would have my little girl in my room by that night.
Well that night turned into 3 days and later into a month....you see my daughter never left the NICU, in the next following 3 days she got worse she ended up having to use a CPAP to help her get oxygen and on Dec, 12 2011 while at home resting and waiting for my husband to finish eating so that we could go and see her I got a call from her doctors. I just remember them saying that my little girl who had all her 10 fingers and 10 toes needed to be transferred to a Childrens Hospital(Lucile Packard Childrens Hospital) beacuse she needed more help then they could give her there. We rushed to the hospital and as soon as we entered the room I couldnt even see her bed beacsue of all the doctors and nurses that were around her. The abulance that was going to take her was already for her they just needed us to sign some paperwork. I dont really remember much about those few minutes that seemed like hours to me. I just remeber seeing my little girl laying there breathing but not really breathing because the ventilator was doing that for her(she had been intubated in those few hours that I was at home waiting for my husband) I didnt really listen to what the doctors said, all i know is that she needed to be put on an ECMO machine i didnt know what that was until I saw her on it.I cried seeing how they transfered her from her bed to the incubator that would take her to the abulance and to the Childrens hospital. They asked us if we wanted her babptized and thats when it hit me and I broke down. There was a big possibility that my daughter wouldnt even make it to the hospital.
It took us 20minutes to get to the hospital and when we got there they were ready for her to have surgery, that would place her on the ECMO machine. They explained what the machine would do for her but all I heard was this is her last and only chance to live. We signed the papers right away and were told that the surgery would take about an hour(thats what my mom tells me I dont remember, it felt like it took forever and at the same timeit felt like it was over very quickly) I have no words to explain how I felt seeing my precious baby girl on that machine, seeing her blood being pumped out of her body, re-oxygenated and put back into her tiny little body.
|Emmaliese on ECMO, thats her daddy next to her.|
|Emmaliese on ECMo, she was on this for a week.|
|My angel on a good day...awake and smiling.|
|One of my many favorite pictures of her.|